If you think that student stereotypes are just a myth, wait until you actually start college. By the end of your first term, you’ll most likely have met most of the following students …
1. The Party Animal
The Party Animal values their social life above everything. They’ll be out every night of the week, because “college is supposed to be for enjoying yourself”. It doesn’t occur to them that the whole point of going to college is to get a degree and improve your career prospects, and that they’re paying for their nights out with student loans.
2. The Midas Touch
Everything seems to be effortless for the student with the Midas touch. They always score top marks for papers, have lots of friends, and easily find people to date. They never seem to be short of cash either. But what you don’t see is when they’re at the limit of their overdraft, they’re lacking in confidence underneath, and they sacrifice sleep to spend long hours in the library working. Appearances can be very deceptive.
3. The Everything at the Last Minute
This student is always the last one to seminars, tiptoes in 15 minutes after the lecture began, and frequently begs their tutors for extensions because they’ve left their work until the last minute. This person badly needs to learn time management skills – and stop going back to sleep after the alarm sounds.
4. The Infinite Money Box
Here’s someone else who always seems to have a lot of friends – because they’re always offering to pay for other people. This can be because they think they need to buy friends, or because they’re simply hopeless with money and have never learned to budget. They like to splash the cash on frivolous things, and never worry about funds running out. But it will, and they’ll deal with it by trying to borrow cash from you, rather than get their finances in order.
5. The User
The User only hangs around with people for what they can get from them. They’ll never have any money when in the bar, or having a meal out. In fact, they’ll invite themselves to anything where they can get something for nothing. They’ll take your food from the fridge without asking, want to borrow your lecture notes week after week, and fail to contribute anything useful to group projects.
6. The Hopeless
This student hasn’t learned to look after themselves. They have no idea how the washing machine works, can’t manage a budget, and seem to think that dirty dishes magically wash themselves. Sometimes they’re lazy, and sometimes their parents have simply failed to teach them the practical life skills they’ll need to be an independent adult.
7. The Inconsiderate
There are plenty of inconsiderate students about, and if you’re unfortunate enough to share a house with them you’ll constantly be asking them to turn their music down and clean the bathroom after use. They’ll talk during classes and in the library. Basically, they’re so self-absorbed that it never occurs to them how their behaviour affects other people – and they wouldn’t care even if they knew.
8. The Dedicated
This student understands that they’re at university to work, and they put everything they have into doing well. They’re first in the library and last to leave. They always hand essays in on time, or even early. Perhaps they’re a little too dedicated, though, and need to put some time aside for relaxing and having fun.
9. The Creep
The Creep doesn’t understand or respect boundaries. He’s the reason people use the #metoo hashtag and thinks he’s doing you a favour by bestowing one of his dubious compliments on you. His compliments will soon turn to insults though, as he doesn’t like rejection. Steer well clear.
10. The Campaigner
This student thinks that they really can change the world. They sign up to every campaign group on campus and think they know everything there is to know about life. The Campaigner will always be trying to sign you up for marches and complain about the inequality of the world. The pressure from them can be relentless, although their heart is often in the right place.